Monday, August 27, 2012

the shower

May 5, 2012.   I can't believe it was here already!!

My Aunt Bridgette, cousin Alex and MOH Vanessa decided to plan my shower. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine the shower would have been as nice as it was.

We arrived at the Mayflower Hotel right on time.  There was a beautiful tea party set up.  All the women were decked out in lovely tea party dresses.  It was great to see all the generations of women in my family- to see my past, present, and future  all in one place.

We each selected teas that we wanted and recieved individual tea pots.  We also recieved individual trays with finger sandwiches, so dainty and nice!

While everyone ate and filled out their games, I mingled from table to table.  As the party progressed, we played games and opened gifts.  Each of the women recieved a favor which was a lovely tea cup and saucer.

From beginning to end, it was beyond enything I could have ever imagined... There are no words to describle how thankful I was for all the time, hard work and love that these women poured into this event and just for me. It is something that I will never forget!

with this ring... i thee wed

The symbol of eternal love that you will give your partner on your wedding day. The ring that he or she will wear on their left hand for the rest of their life. So choosing the right ring is no pressure right?
Lyndon and I chose our rings a couple months ago but we finally paid them off and picked them up this past Saturday! Being as compulsive as I am, I decided to use the spare time to get some wedding things done. Lyndon does part time security at a high end jewelry store, and it just so happens to be the place he got my engagement ring, so there was no question on where we would shop for our bands.
Traditionally, couples would choose matching bands, like my parents, aunts, uncles and even grandparents did. I knew I wanted something that matched my engagement ring, and Lyndon would want something that is simple and classic. We decided to go with different bands, but we would engrave the inside with our initials and our wedding date.

We decided that white gold was the way to go. My engagement ring is a 1.06 ct. round solitaire with 22 small diamonds as side accents on the band. I ended up choosing a custom design that has 26 matching diamonds. Lyndon chose a palladium ring that looks like brushed silver. His ring completely matches his style- simple yet classy.

Something that we learned was choosing a ring earlier, gives you enough time to pay it off, and even shop for sales. There are always sales going on so keep on the look out and do not settle! Remember you will wear this ring forever, so why not go with what you like!

playing catch up- photographer

I know everything happens for a reason.... but somethings make you wonder.

It's Thursday, March 1, 2012.  I just left work and remembered that I needed to call my photographer, Soheil, to confirm his address.  We were going to send in another payment and with a check that big, you don't want it to fall in the wrong hands.  As usual, I forgot what his address was so I needed him to remind me for the millionth time. Our conversation was short and nice.  He sounded a little tired, almost as if I had waken him.  I got the address and told him the check was in the mail.

We just recieved our thank you notes, and I thought it would be nice to write him a nice note on our personalized stationary.  After two drafts, our letter was complete.  Enclosed  was our deposit.  Once again I had waited until the last minute and Sunday night at 10pm was when I was writing the letter.  Having the OCD mentality that I do, I needed further confirmation that I had gotten the right address.  I began going through all my emails and letters and things trying to find something that had his address on it.

Being too lazy to go downstairs for my "wedding bag" (yes I have an entire bag filled with wedding materials), I began to search the web.  I looked on his personal site, and then on facebook.  It was then that my heart sank.....

There in plain text, written on his wall were condolences. Soheil had died Saturday, March 3, 2012.  I read through each posting trying to figure out what happened. Was this some kind of joke?  I just spoke to him!  I shook Lyndon awake so he could help me figure out what happened.  I felt as if a family member had passed.

While the details of his passing are too much to write, the fact that he is gone is devastating.  Not just because he was our photographer, but because he was more than that. He had been in our lives for a brief moment and yet he left such deep footprints in his path.  Looking back now, I realize he was such a kind hearted individual, almost angelic like.  Yes I know it seems crazy but that is how I felt.  He was so kind and calm, soft spoken but powerful beyond measure.  Although he is gone, his presence is still here.  It is in every photo that he took,  the beauty that he was able to capture, the life that he documented through his lens.

Lyndon and I were extremely lucky to have had our engagement session with him. I was honored to be apart of the photos that he took.  To this day, (April 26th), I can say that we don't have a photographer. Everyone that we have spoken with just hasn't been like Soheil.  All I know is, whoever we choose, they will have big shoes to fill.

Rest in peace my friend.



Thursday, May 10, 2012

playing catch up- the dress part deux

Where oh where has the time gone?  I feel like I blinked and months flew right by!  I can't believe we are at the 80 day mark.  So let's get caught up, shall we?

Last time I wrote, we were at the cash register ordering my wedding dress.  As I stated, the worst thing imaginable happened. The consultant had informed me that the dress had in fact been discontinued.
 "So what does this mean for me?", I asked.  Basically, I had two.... well one choice really.  I can either take the sample dress that I tried on, or I could walk away.  There were no other dresses being made, and there were only 4 dresses in my size in the continental USA.  No pressure, right?   One of the things that David's Bridal does is make all their dresses ready to go, so essentially, each dress in the store can be bought as is.  That is fine for a normal dress, but for a wedding dress?  If you've ever been a bride or bridesmaid and tried on dresses at DB's, you will know that the dresses there really take a beating.  There are holes and tears and all kinds of stains.

Would I really want a dress that so many others had tried on and abused?  I asked the manager if there was any way I could get a discount since this was the last dress of that style.  I was told because the dress was from the Fall 2010 line, and the price had been dramatically reduced, the only thing they could do was take off an additional $100, but I would have to take the dress that day, and they would not do any alterations or cleaning/ fittings. (Great discount, right?)  My other alternative was to pay for the dress as is, have the alterations department clean the dress, reinforce each applique and bead and then move forward with fittings and alterations.

What to choose, what to do?  I decided to take a lunch break, (yes, we had been there from 10- 2pm), think it over, and then come back and make a final decision.

In my heart, my frugal frugal heart, I knew that I did not want to spend a lot of money on a dress. Plain and simple.  The idea of spending ridiculous amounts of money on a dress that I would only wear once was beyond the grasp of what my frugal pocket could bear.   I also knew  that I am plus size, which means most places slap on the "fat tax". Was this really my dress?  Would I be ok if I walked away and then found out someone had in fact bought the dress..my dress?

I decided to go ahead and get it. There were no tears, no crazy antics like what goes on Say Yes to the dress, (Love that show!), but I just had the feeling that I couldn't walk away. I waited a couple weeks for the alterations to be done, had another fitting and have had the dress ever since. All is well in dress land.   :)
ConversLuv

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

the little bo-peep dress

Being plus sized, it is difficult finding clothes on a normal day. For some reason, our society feels that the larger you get, the uglier the clothes should be. How many times have you gone to the store, and found a classic button down top..... but the sleeves are 3/4 long? (I HATE those shirts!) Finding the right wedding dress can be just as difficult, if not worse.
From the beginning, I stated that I did not want to spend a lot of money on my dress. I couldn't justify spending thousands of dollars on a dress that I could only wear once. I chose to go to my local David's Bridal store and check it out. With the OCD kicking in, I went to the site and printed all the dresses that I liked, so I could give the consultant a good idea of what I was looking for.
On the day of the appointment, my small team of girls and myself traveled to the store. Apparently, the store changed locations. (Always double check the address!) We were early, so we had enough time to get to the right location. Our consultant greeted us, and the process began. I had this vision that it was going to be like the show, "Say yes to the dress." I would try on a dress, walk out and tears would instantly form in my mother's eyes. I would see myself in the mirror and start to bawl, this is the dress!! But that didn't quite happen for me.

I was told up front that DB could not alter the dresses in any way that would change the design, (i.e. use the top of one dress, and the bottom of another, or remove the lace, etc.) While I was trying on dresses, I felt they looked, "ok" but I didn't get that wow factor that I was looking for. I started to fear that I wouldn't find the dress. My mother picked out a dress that she liked and showed it to me. At first I didn't like it at all. I even named it the, "Little Bo- Peep" dress. My team loved the dress, but I couldn't see myself in it. I didn't even want to try it on.
After minutes of debating back and forth, my mother put her foot down and insisted that I try it on. I knew things looked different on the hanger, but I wasn't interested. Finally I gave in and tried it. As I walked out, everyone loved the dress... I was waiting for that teary moment, but never got it. Don't get me wrong, the dress was beautiful, but it just didn't do it for me. I loved the top of it, but hated the skirt. It gave me a wonderful hour glass shape and was gorgeous...but I hated that skirt. I took it off and continued trying on other dresses. I narrowed it down to three- one that I liked, one that was plain, and the one my team liked, the little bo-peep dress.

Convinced that I would prove them wrong, I decided to try on the plain dress first, the little bo-peep dress second, and then my choice last. The first one was nice, but it was too plain, and I also didn't like the fabric. I tried on the little bo-peep dress again. Once again, I loved the top, but hated the skirt. As I stared at the dress in the mirror, having my own private moment in the chaotic and loud dressing room, I slowly lifted the top layer of the dress and rolled it asside. There it was. Beneath the top layer was a satin skirt. The more and more I played around with the dress, the more I liked it. I hated to admit it, but the little bo- peep dress kicked all the other dresses out the window. The problem was David's Birdal already told me they couldn't alter the design of the dress at all.

My mother saw what I was doing an confirmed that it is possible for her to remove the top layer of the skirt. (Of course she can sew, is there anything she can't do?!) Right then and there, I decided this was the dress for me!! I couldn't believe that I had chosen a dress on the first visit, and it was under budget!
As I got dressed and headed to the front of the store, our consultant began ringing up our purchases. She ordered the shoes, and the veil. As she attempted to order the dress, one of the worst things imaginable happened...

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Engagement Session part deux

































In the couple days leading up to our engagement session, I have to admit that I was a little overwhelmed. Being the typical OCD person that I am, I began to fret about taking the actual pictures. These will most likely be the pictures that we use in our save the dates, so what should we wear?!!

Finally we decided that Lyndon would wear a light purple button down shirt, with a gray and black argyle diamond sweater, dark blue jeans, and black boots. I decided on a white button down, with a purple cardigan, dark blue jeans and black booties. I had on a silver and purple necklace, silver ball earrings, and my engagement ring of course!

A couple nights before, our photographer sent us a list of do's and don'ts Here are my top 4 favorite:

1. Wear comfortable SHOES!! I thought I was soooo cute in my black bootie heels, but as we kept walking on the uneven paved walk way, and on the bridge through the park, I quickly realized heels weren't such a good idea. We would walk a little, stop and take a couple pictures and then continue walking. By the time we took the last shot, we were on the other side of the lake!! I dreaded every single step back to the car. (But I LOVE my heels!!) The sad part is that they never made it into any of the photos! Looking back, it wasn't worth the pain.


2. Definitely eat before the session.
There is nothing more embarrassing in my opinion that staring into your hunny's eyes and hearing nothing but nature.....and your stomach growling. I was soooo glad for that donut!

3. Leave your phones, purses, and anything that you don't need in the car. As you walk around, you will take off your coats and other excess belongings. It eventually becomes cumbersome to have to drag around unnecessary items.

And finally, 4. Enjoy the moment. How often do you get to take some time out and really share that special moment with your beau? Even though Lyndon and I try to, we often get caught up in our day to day routines. This was a great opportunity for us to re-connect.

On the morning of the session, Lyndon and I got as camera ready as we could, grabbed a light breakfast, (iced coffee and a donut for me!!), and headed to to the pre-arranged location. Our photographer was running a little late, but that was perfect because it gave us just enough time to scope the place out and take it all in. Once he arrived, he explained to us what would happen. We walked, talked, laughed and had a great time! I have to say that it's amazing the way he captured certain shots. It felt very relaxed and comfortable.


Overall, I thought it was a great experience and our photographer was so wonderful. He really put us at ease and guided us through the session in such an unobtrusive way. I loved it!! Here are some of the pictures we took. I am waiting on the dvd containing the actual pictures, but here are a couple that tried to save just so you could see. Enjoy!!

Monday, October 3, 2011

a picture is worth a thousand words....

So far in our wedding planning, we have been lucky- I have an aunt that does catering, a venue that allows her to cater there, another aunt who bakes the most delicious cakes, a dj who we have used for years, a mother who is so creative that she can do just about anything. (Say hello to my new florist!) lol. Even with all of this, there is one thing that has me a little on edge- the photographer and videographer.

I feel that years from now, no one is going to remember what you ate, or what you said, or that it rained, or even that you had cold feet. As time goes on, some of the special memories and details that you swore you would never forget, will fade and all that remains are the pictures and videos. So why am I so nervous? I have heard far to many horror stories of pictures getting lost, or couples having to sue their photographer because they failed to deliver what they promised. The more and more I kept asking for refferals, the more horror stories I got. I have to admit, I was a little worried that we might just have to settle. And then it happened....

My parents were working a special event where they happened to meet a photographer. They liked him so much that they took his card and instantly told me to check him out. Before you knew it, we set up an appointment and it was there that I instantly fell in love with his work. As soon as we walked in, you could tell that this person does photography for a living, not just a hobby, and has a true passion for it.

He showed us all the different options, and what I like most is that you can pick a basic package and then add a la carte items. I hadn't even thought about getting blown up photos in addition to albums. He really educated us on the whole process and made us feel at ease. This was it. I knew that he is the photographer for us. I asked the future husband what he thought and he got the same vibe.

It feels great to check one more thing off the list. With our upcoming engagement session, it is starting to feel real. I guess the next battle for us is, what to wear?!